I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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