they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Randomize
