I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
