awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
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