but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize