Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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