OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
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