umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize