There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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