The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
