Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
