Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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