I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
