I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
