Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
