It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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