Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
