i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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