I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
