everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
