She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Randomize
