yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Randomize
