I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
