I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Randomize
