my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Randomize
