Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
