I feel like abortions should bother me more
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
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