eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
