Can i not drive my cunt home
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
