So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
