Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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