Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
