I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize