This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize