i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
