yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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