Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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