I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
