Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
