You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I swear to god I'm with a high end prostitute right now and shes the most interesting person I've ever met. She just took me in to share an evening.
And as an added bonus she seems to have gotten a blood stain out of my favorite t-shirt
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize