I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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