So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
