is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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