Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
you made out with another girl for some wings
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Randomize
