I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
