Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
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