I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
