Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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