I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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