Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Randomize
